Recently, my wife and some of her girlfriends had a ladies movie night.
As the evening drew to a close and I emerged from the back room, I walked into an unexpected conversation about Mardi Gras Fat Tuesday. The discussion focused on the odd contradiction of gluttonizing oneself the day before Lent and completely gorging oneself the day before fasting.
For some reason, bachelor parties immediately came to mind and it seemed there was a similar parallel. For many guys and this can go for ladies toothey desire to have a one last night of other women before being chained down to one woman for the rest of their lives. Some men wish to have a stripper come to the party. Others prefer multiple women by going to a strip club complete with lap dances. In this shallow view, marriage is seen as a sort of slavery, something that will suck the life out of you, taking away your freedom and any chance of fun.
The mindset, therefore, is that a guy must live it up one last time.
This kind of gloomy anticipation of marriage always makes me wonder why they want to get married in the first place. It reminds me of the popular t-shirt which has a bride and a groom standing next to each other. The bride has a huge smile on her face while the groom wears a huge frown. For my bachelor party, we played Laser Tag, came back and played video games and watched movies while eating man food. Sadly, this is not always the case.
Some desire one last hoorah with someone other than the person they are engaged to. Getting stone drunk or having strippers before marriage is, at best, an oxymoron. Your wife or husband is our 1 before and after marriage. The wedding is just the next step of the journey.
So, it is essential to train ourselves in faithfulness to our spouse and to form good habits long before that big day even arrives.
If someone believes they are losing their life and freedom by getting married, then can they really know what marriage is? Perhaps they are not ready or mature enough to enter into this serious sacrament of holy matrimony. Or, perhaps they need to read and learn what marriage is about and then prepare themselves more for that sacrament. You are not having your freedom taken away in marriage per say, but rather, you are surrendering certain things for the sake of your beloved.
The sacrifices are done out of love, and this kind of love yields an amazing power, beauty, and contentment. As a married man, I am more than happy to commit to my wife, my best friend, my soulmate, and to sacrifice certain things for my bride.
While marriage takes work, no doubt, there is no real happiness or fulfillment without it. Love and marriage are about giving, not receiving.
But, if both lovers give all they have to each other, then both simultaneously receive. Marriage is a reciprocal gift of self, a beautiful life-long gift of love which makes you holy! Article originally published by CatholicMatch Institutewhich provides resources to help single Catholics develop a strong foundation for marriage through advocacy, programs, and scholarships. Used with permission.
Basic male bonding activities
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